Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Martha Stewart: Sick and Wrong Edition

Oh, I've got a little Martha in me. I like the decorating and the being crafty and the cooking and the entertaining. I just bring a little of the "inappropriate" to the party. Oh, and add a tipsy twist, of course. I'm probably somewhere between Martha and Julia Child. No stick up the ass like the former but a propensity for taking a nip or two while going about my kitchen wizardry like the latter. "And a little for the chef!!!!" So anyway, in addition to being a semi-professional smart-ass, I also know my way around the kitchen. What's that you say? You've followed my blog and are aware that I nearly gave 9 out of 10 party-goers alcohol poisoning with my meatball shots? Shut up, you. I just.....just....God. You forget to bring one alcohol laden sauce to a boil and people never let you hear the end of it. I will say that they were the most popular balls in the room. Anyway, as a lifestyle guru such as myself is wont to do at this time of year, I have turned my attentions to dazzling my public. One thing I am certain of is that the McKennie/Christie contingent present on Christmas morning will be enjoying my world-famous Breakfast Enchiladas. Well, technically, they're Southern Living's Breakfast Enchiladas. But whatever. Details, shmee-tails. And 'cause I'm cool like that, I'm going to share. So here you go:

Breakfast Enchiladas

1 lb package hot ground pork sausage
2 T butter
4 green onions, thinly sliced
2 T chopped fresh cilantro
14 (yes, you’re reading that correctly) large eggs, beaten
3/4 t salt
1/2 t pepper
Cheese Sauce (recipe to follow)
8 (8”) flour tortillas
1 c Pepper Jack cheese

Cook sausage in a large non-stick skillet over medium-high heat, stirring until sausage crumbles and is no longer pink. Remove from pan and drain.

Melt butter in a large non-stick skillet over medium  heat. Add green onions and cilantro, saute 1 minute. Add eggs and scramble. Remove from heat and fold in 1 1/2 cups of cheese sauce and all of the sausage. Sppon 1/3 cup of egg mixture down middle of each tortilla and roll, placing seam side down in a lightly greased 9x13 baking dish. Pour remaining cheese sauce over tortillas and sprinkle with all of Pepper Jack.  Bake at 350 for 30 minutes or until bubbly.

Cheese Sauce
1/3 c butter
1/3 c flour
3 c milk
2 c shredded cheddar cheese
1 (4.5 oz) can chopped green chiles, undrained
3/4 t salt

Melt butter in heavy saucepan over medium-low heat; whisk in flour until smooth. Cook, whisking constantly, 1 minute. Gradually whisk in milk; cook over medium heat, whisking constantly, 5 minutes or until thickened. Remove from heat and whisk in remaining ingredients.

I like to serve this with fresh guacamole, sour cream and a good New Mexican red chile sauce. The cool thing about this is that you can prepare it a couple of days before and then just toss it in the oven while pouring copious amounts of Bailey's into your coffee mug. So there you have it!  You will amaze your family who will undoubtedly wonder aloud as mine often does, "How does he/she do it when he/she is half-crocked most of the time?" Haaaaaaa, suckas......I can accomplish more half-crocked than most clowns can accomplish completely UN-crocked.  If un-crocked is not a word, it should be. Trust me. You want to keep me crocked.  If I wasn't I may well take over the world. And then who knows what might happen. Disclaimer: I am not half-crocked most of the time.  A quarter-crocked perhaps but half is a gross exaggeration.

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