Wednesday, February 17, 2010


Can I tell ya how happy I am that I've been up since 2 am? Thrilled. What is thrilling is that I am very nearly caught up on laundry. When does THAT happen? Like for one shining moment, every freakin' item that needs laundering in this entire household has been laundered. Until the boys wake up and discard their underwear on the floor. And then it starts all over again. But for a couple of hours it was ALL done. My kitchen is clean and shiny too. Even the stainless steel. And there's a lotta stainless steel. How you like me NOW, mom? Grrrr. Oh, and the table has been set for dinner! WITH linen napkins. NO, the pope is not coming to to celebrate Ash Wednesday and NO, that is not our usual habit. However I am beginning to freak out about my son turning 11 and think it's best to start actually sitting down and TALKING at some point during the day before it's too late and he's run off and joined the circus. Or run away FROM one as the case may be. So that initiative is officially underway thanks to my simply lovely table. I've also downloaded some images for Jack's biography speech tomorrow......gotta have that visual aid! I've also planned tonight's dinner, made a shopping list for both the grocery store and Costco. The plan is to get to the grocery store at 6 a.m. so at least that stop will have been crossed off the list before anyone even wakes up. 'Ceptin' for me, of course. 'Cause I don't sleep. Never really have. This isn't some middle-age phenomena for me. I remember being a little kid and hating sleepovers because I would inevitably wake up in the middle of the night and because it's not your house you have to just lay there and wait for morning. The one time I actually did venture to the bathroom during a sleepover I ran into my friend's dad who was walking around in a shiny, light blue banana hammock. And he was all hairy and gross. And had some weird 'fro looking hair-do. Looked kinda like Hair Bear from that 70's cartoon. Scarred for life. I mean who does that? No wonder I don't sleep. It's amazing I'm still hetero. Yuck. I'm getting skeeved out just thinking about it. Anyway, so I've never been a sleeper. What pisses me off is that I would really, really LOVE to sleep. I've got no quarrel with slumber. It looks damn good. And now, they've got these kick-ass drugs that nobody will give me. It seems that my doctors all want to find out WHY I don't sleep. I DO NOT CARE WHY. I JUST WANT TO SLEEP, GOD DAMNIT. While I have been known to enjoy a cocktail every now again (HEIMLICH), I am not a pill popper. No threat of addiction. And I don't care about the side effects. I'll show you a side freakin' table HAS BEEN SET FOR DINNER SINCE 3 AM!!!!! What's the worst that could happen? I end up driving around and not knowing it? As apparently that's one of the side-effects. Which actually explains a lot. The people around here are not shitty drivers. They took Ambien and don't KNOW that they're driving. I feel much better now. Okay, going to alphabetize the spices now.


  1. Good Lord, promise me it wasn't Jack in the banana hammock...

  2. See if that was me, I'd probably top myself. I get annoyed and call it 'can't sleep' when I toss and turn for all of five minutes. And IF I was to get up I just know all I'd do would be to sit fulminating on the couch watching brain dead stuff and eating shite. I generally speaking could sleep on a knife-edge during an earthquake while the house was being burgaled and the police were at the door with whirling blue lights. I tend to rather over-do it in fact and have been known to creep back in after finally getting up at 11am. A happy medium for us both would be good eh?