Normally when I am hauled into my son's elementary school, it is because of something I have written about in my blog that offended some random twat. Well, in truth I have not been physically hauled in per se.......something about the First Amendment. But trust me, I hear about it. Ad nauseum. Blah, fucking blah. Anyway, this meeting wasn't about me. It was a parent/teacher conference. Because Jack struggles a bit in school, these things are not normally pleasant experiences. Well, lo and freakin' behold, it was GOOD news. I have to say that Jack's teachers have all been beyond awesome. He goes to an incredible school and we are really lucky. The past couple of years however have rocked that boys world. We have gone from a second grader who wanted NOTHING to do with school to a kid that can't wait to get there. He even WANTS to go in early one day a week to work on math with his teacher. This teacher is an incredible dude. I think part of the draw for Jack is that he's a guy but he is also one of those special teachers that you always remember. He just has a very chill demeanor that works magic with the kids. This is a person that could surely do anything but actually chooses to teach our kids for what I'm sure is not adequate pay for the effort expended. There are people out there that actually care more about the very important job of educating young minds than their own bottom line. And for that I am eternally grateful. So we sat down at our conference yesterday, the notorious naughty mommy blogger and the rock star/emcee that cracked jokes about martinis as he hosted the school talent show last week. I'm sure we even look guilty. Probably because we are. Not that we've been on any intrastate crime sprees lately but surely we've had some transgressions not perpetrated by your average parent. Sorry. I always try to imagine what Jack's teachers are thinking when they look down at their conference schedule and "Oh look! It's the Christie's!" In my mind a flask comes out and a bracing shot of fortitude is consumed. I know I need one before I go in. (I AM JOKING, MOTHER......everybody knows you drink AFTER conferences, not before!!!!). So we're sitting there in those tiny chairs looking like we're expecting to be reprimanded and "the" tell-tale file is on the table between us and Jack's teacher. It looked like it should be pushed across the table like evidence. "We KNOW you did this, so don't even try to deny it". Guess what? It contained tests. That Jack PASSED. He has made amazing, incredible progress this year. I won't bore you with the details but he is now ABOVE the district average in both reading and math. This would amaze you if you knew where he started the year. I literally started tearing up when I thanked his teacher for everything he's done for him. I would have hugged him but I'm not exactly the hugging type. Shocking, I know. Hot DAMN! I was so proud of Jack and so grateful for this super cool teacher dude that I felt like waving those tests over my head like a freakin' Oscar or a gold medal. 'Cause that's how good it felt. So thank you teachers.......seriously. I'll be back to being snarky momentarily but I need to give a shout out to all of you, particularly Mr. A, also referred to by his students as Mr. Awesome. For good reason. You rock hard.