Monday, April 26, 2010

Boobquake! that my pity party (table for one, please?) has concluded, I will now enlighten you as to the brilliance that is "Boobquake".  This was dreamed up by a sista blogger named Jen McCreight in response to an Iranian clerics assertion that "Many women who do not dress moderately......lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society which consequently increases earthquakes". This genius's name is Hojatolesiam Kazem Sedighi. He lost me at Ho. Apparently, he is not just a cleric but a seismologist! Wow! Are male babies routinely dropped on their heads as a rite of passage in Iran? Seriously? Yep. All of the world's troubles are caused by women and their lady bits. Um, excuse me, Hojowhateveryourname is......see that thing dangling between you legs? IT'S CALLED A PENIS. Young men are lead astray by their penises!!!!! Look down there again......there should also be a set of balls. And coursing around your hairy little body is this stuff called TESTOSTERONE. All of that stuff is what leads to being lead astray! And corrupts chastity! And leads to adultery! I'm pretty sure it's not all the fault of women and their boobs, dumbass. You see, we are mammals and are programmed to procreate our species!  And guess what!? Males are usually the pursuers! They are supposed to spread their gene pool! With their PENISES. I personally have never met a penis that caused an earthquake but that doesn't mean it couldn't happen. The earthquake, not me meeting one. So anyway, I am all for this initiative. I'm going to go out and shake my boobs around in my most revealing shirt. You might want to lock up your china cabinet and stow any loose objects. Join me, won'tcha?


  1. Well, I signed up and just changed my shirt. If you hear about any quakes in SE Michigan, I'll be searching for that old turtleneck and sports bra

  2. As far as a quake in Michigan goes, it can and does happen!